As I continue working with my children I begin running through my head all the reasons why I am having such hard time getting them to just understand as well as where the headache came from.  Maybe it was because,  regardless of what I said to my children they just didn't seem to understand me.  Or should I say they just didn't listen...

It just felt like it was one of those days where if I pushed through it, it would only make it worse.  However I continued to push through anyway.  I wanted to make sure we stuck to the schedule and keep things going as if we were in the class room with the exception that we had more time.

When it was all said and done, the children finished their work but it was already 5pm and it was time to cook dinner.  By this time they went from complaining about the school work to complaining about being hungry and not being able to do what ever it is THEY want to do. 
I am sure some of you can relate to this. 
Here is the thing though.  It took for me to go through all of that (multiple time) and be, well plainly put, MISERABLE to realize that I was part of the problem.

You see, when we first started out with home schooling, I had these fairy tales ideas of how everything was suppose to go, look and feel.  My children would be sitting upright in their seats at the table and waiting patiently for me to answer what ever questions they may have.

Hmmm..... well that is VERY unrealistic. In fact that is not even our family.  So after venting to a friend about some of the issues that I felt we were having she helped me to realize that my children were still deprogramming.


They were still seeing things the public school way.  Which, by the way, was true because I was to the point where if I heard well Mrs. so and so said this or Mrs. so and so told us that this was the way, my head was going to burst. The funny thing is that  deprogramming is not just for the children.  It it a process that the parents have to go through as well.  Especially those of us who want to do everything right and stick with the books as to be sure we don't leave anything out of there education.  It may also be for those of us who are fearful about messing up their education instead of helping them. 

So after this discovery I began to look at their school work through a different lens and take a different approach.  I continue to use the same curriculum, I still have the room set up the same way, but because I took a step back to better look at the situation I am able to focus on them enjoying learning instead of focusing on getting it correct the first time or completed and staying on task.  I took a step back took a deep breath and just let go and let God.

It is because of Gods love and guidance that I was led to home school so why would I do it any other way.  With this new mind set I was able slow my mind process and accept that fact that every day will not be completely finished the way the book says or maybe at all.  I realized that many times we took the lesson to the store with us or on a weekend trip with out even trying to.

So now when I feel myself trying to follow the book word by word or when my children start getting that blank stare or far away look with a frown I know that I am falling back to my old ways.
I will admit that this deprogramming process is just as hard for me as it is for my children.  I know some days just like them I just want to pull the covers over my head and pray that it is Saturday.

So with a renewed mind set and constant reassurance from my husband and of course God I continue on.  With God leading me I continue to encourage our children to do their best each day.

Sterling College
Truth be told God warned me not to add anything to my schedule this year anyway, and I am beginning to see why.  It will take us the entire year for us to get to a point of normalcy in our schooling as well as our new lifestyle.


Rushing through...

Have you ever driven anywhere and taken that quick look in your side view mirror or out of the back window to check for other cars coming?  You know the kind of look that you think you see everything.  Then, when you proceed to move into the next lane, you are startled by a blaring horn letting you know to go back. 

I think of that and wonder sometimes if that is how we can be with God.  We take a quick listen and rush off to complete the task.  Or half listen and misunderstand what he is telling us all together.

We tend to do that with God at times.  We pray and ask for help, patience, or even courage, but when God try’s to direct us in the way we should go we quickly rush off to do what we think He is telling us to do.  We should remember to slowly look before moving, or sit still and listening intently to the directions so that we are more successful in the ways he directs us.

It is so easy sometimes to get comfortable in the word we know and forget that the word is for constant growth.  So even if you have been a devout Christian for 40 years there is always something that could be learned or practiced, causing us to constantly grow and mature spiritually.

Are actions should reflect the love of instruction from our heavenly father…. (Prov. 12:1).  Not only through our thoughts but also through our actions we are too listen and obey.  To many times we as Christians tend to want to rush through things in life.  Once we start doing that, we begin to miss the smaller things that support the bigger picture.   We make it harder on ourselves to see and understand what it is he wants us to do or say when we get comfortable in one season of our lives and maybe a little to relaxed to where we don’t act with care.  Are actions may become careless and we may begin to allow certain things in our life we KNOW is not of God because we feel we are up for the challenge.

  But of course God is so great and wonderful and knows that we are not perfect and so He waits patiently like a loving parent does for us to sit and listen carefully.  He waits for us to give Him our undivided attention to receive the lesson(s) we are to learn.  Young or old we all have moments that we slip up and rush through. 

Me personally, I am grateful to my God for his guiding hand, patience and understanding.  I believe because He knows us better than we know ourselves he understands and waits till we are ready to listen.